Sunday, September 20, 2009

#5 - Soap Operas


No matter how bitchy or tyrannical she may be, every woman is a damsel in distress waiting for a prince in shining armor to appear.

This absurdity stems from the warped sense of reality created long ago by movies like Cinderella, the little Mermaid and Sleeping Beauty.

And most unfortunately, this penchant for the dramatic only gets worse with age, as the fantasy grows more magical with evermore chick flicks, and the reality  grows less and less appealing with evermore failed relationships.
In order to keep their fantasies alive, women drown out the sound of reason and common sense with scandalous love affairs from 'The Bold and the Beautiful' and exhilirating fight scenes from 'The Young and the Restless'. Nothing fuels the insanity more effectively than surrounding oneself with irrational drama queens and steamy love triangles.



Unfortunately, it is not possible to stay perpetually glued to the television set. Or online chat rooms about Chad's latest love affair with the comatose nurse. When women are forced to transition back into their tepid suburban existence, they suddenly feel a desperate need to recreate that same level of urgency and excitement in their own surroundings. 

Enter irrational tantrums, nuclear meltdowns and melodramatic breakdowns. 

It has nothing to do with you being inattentive or inconsiderate and EVERYTHING to do with whatever incestuous scandal erupted on Days of Our Lives that day. But she doesn't realize that. So you're screwed anyway.

They all live in an irrational fantasy world. That's the problem with women.

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